These past few weeks I’ve found a renewed commitment to defining my dreams. There was a point in my life when I knew, I KNEW, exactly what I wanted out of life and had a plan to get there. But the last two years have found me slowly sliding backwards and down into a dark and murky place where I didn’t know much of anything, least of all what my hopes and dreams were. I mean, if I can’t figure out what I want to wear for days on end or what I want to eat for dinner for the past week, and if I’m afraid to actually look for a job because I might get one, figuring out my future becomes kind of impossible.

I’m trying not to focus on that. On the negative and the past. Instead I’m trying to refocus on the positive and the moment I’m actually living. With the help of some medication and therapy, I’ve found a calmer place with which to work from.

I suddenly remembered one of my favorite quotes yesterday:

“If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.”

Henry David Thoreau

When I stopped to really examine why I was so far away from remembering what my goals and dreams were, I realized I was afraid and that I had been afraid for quite some time. It’s such a relief to not be so afraid anymore. To be able to look at the future head on and pick from the entire Universe of opportunities and decide what I want in my life.