Internet relationships can blossom; I’m a believer.
Written by OMSHt: OMSH, photos 20 Comments
I’ve heard countless people now sharing experiences of meeting people in real life (IRL) they met online. Now, I’ve had this opportunity more than once, my first internet meeting being with Kerflop at Blogher ’06.
I thought I would be nervous, but I wasn’t at all. After years of phone conversations and thousands of IMs and emails, there was already so much shared.
But there is something missing when you can’t be near someone you are such good friends with online. There were times I wanted to drive over and help her out on bad days. When my son was in the hospital, it was so hard for her to sit and wait for phone calls. More than once we sent care packages, called local restaurants for home deliveries, made ourselves available for late night crisis calls, and in general, did all the friend things.
We’ve grown up together online, started and sold businesses, and stretch each other at every turn. I love this woman and I know she loves me, and when we met again at Blogher ’07, we kicked our feet up with several of our other internet friends and had the time of our lives.
Seven months have passed and in that seven months I’ve met even more online friends, some I’ve come to know more personally than others, but I’m thankful for all of them.
One of those friends, Bethany was driving through our area of Texas en route to see family and made a 3 day stopover in OMSHville.
From the start, I knew it was going to be a fabulous time; it was. In fact, as much as we wore each other out, keeping late hours, it was 100% fun. The guys got along fabulously. The kids had a great time. Everyone slept hard when we did and walked around with bedheads in the morning. Coffee was the mainstay and the click of keystrokes went on all the live long day.
Photo by: Bethany Actually
I couldn’t have dreamed it would have been any better. And as much as I know there are real things to be concerned about when you invite perfect strangers to one’s home – I never felt like Bethany was a stranger.
With blogs, flickr, email and IM, the internet is very much a living and breathing environment. Relationships that start here can blossom into something that clearly can extend beyond the monitor.
I’ve experienced it more than once now; I’m a believer.
Have you?
What’s your experience?
February 14th, 2008 at 2:03 am
[…] Internet relationships can blossom. I’m a firm believer. Read more over at Flawed but Authentic. »» commentsAt Blogher last year, I got joked with for using my breasts as a tripod – it was the breastpod, and it provided a couple of good stops for me. However, if you’ve no breastolas (heh heh)…check out the string tripod. »» comments […]
February 14th, 2008 at 2:32 am
I met Kristin from Better Now/Parent Dish and she every kind of awesome.
I am meeting up with her again next month and I can’t hardly wait 🙂
February 14th, 2008 at 2:38 am
Okay, so I met this lady in real life ONCE before our internet relationship started, but I really got to know my brother’s wife online. She’s my bestest friend and in the four years I’ve known her, we’ve only seen eachother about three times. It feels like old friends though, because of our blogs and our IMing.
Great post!
February 14th, 2008 at 2:53 am
Well, clearly I have met you, Heather, but my first internet/real life collision was with Brenda from Secret Agent Josephine. I, once again, was visiting family in her neighborhood (sorta). We arranged to meet, and when she greeted me with the words “It’s my stalker!” I knew we would get along just fine. Though of course with the two years I’d been reading and commenting on her blog and Flickr photos, and the many emails and IMs between us, I was never in any doubt. I even got to meet her SIL Heather of Comfortably Crazy at the same time, whom I didn’t know as well, but because I got to meet her in real life I now consider her a friend as well.
As Brenda says, think of how random it is to befriend someone just because you happen to sit next to them in history class, or buy coffee from the same Starbucks. Think of how the internet allows people with similar interests and beliefs and senses of humor to find each other, despite geographical distance, and how much sense it makes that the people you meet online could become your friends.
February 14th, 2008 at 7:01 am
I feel like I have “met” the authors of my favorite blogs although to date back and forth direct communication has been sparse. It doesn’t matter – I LOVE the feeling of friendship and in time there might be more.
But, hey, it is Valentine’s Day and my ACTUAL meet is a Valentine story. I met Bill via an online group for single rvrs (which we both are). We met in the chatroom – he asked for my email address, we started emailing…fun, funny stuff, rv stories, bit by bit over 6 months of internet and then phone we got to know each other. In October I flew to his home (we have homes 2652 miles apart…) for our first date – a 10 day 24/7 first date that went so well that when I flew home, it took me 4 days to pack up my motorhome and head back to him. We have been together since and we both fully expect this to be a “rest of our lives” thing. I am 52 and he is 58 – both veterans of failed marriages and relationships.
Was it the internet “meet” that made this work??? I don’t know, but I do know that we had a chance to learn about each other in a unique (to us) way and when we did meet – despite cautions to each other that we might feel a bit uncomfortable to start – there was no discomfort and we felt like old and dear friends.
February 14th, 2008 at 7:47 am
Well, I met you…
February 14th, 2008 at 9:16 am
I met my friend Sandra on an online mommy group. My family has traveled to her several times for mini-vacations. It was so much fun staying up late and chatting without a phone or computer between us.
In addition to this I have also met with local mommies that I have talked with online first. We get together from time to time with the kids in good weather.
Another internet person I met was my husband. We had a long distance relationship for a while, but once we were engaged he moved here. We have now been married almost seven years and have two little boys to prove that online works!
Hopefully one day I will get to meet other amazing online people at BlogHer. . . a girl can dream 🙂
February 14th, 2008 at 9:56 am
Hi there… I love how well you explained this phenomenon.
I found your blog via Bethanys via Brenda just last week and I’ve been reading all about your time together. I loved reading it and looking at your pictures and have you linked in google reader so I can keep up.
I too am amazed with the concept of making real friends via the internet. 3 years ago I would have thought it was insane and completely unsafe but when I discovered blogging in the spring of ’05, I started making real friends right away.
Most recently, I have met my true soul sister, best friend extraordinaire, and it all began by me commenting on her blog, her reciprocating, leading to IM’s where we discovered how amazingly much we have in common.
The thing that really intrigued me about yours and Bethanys getting together is that the hubbies were cool with it too. My sweety just doesn’t really get the concept and I don’t know if he’d be willing to go with me to meet up with my blog friends. I’ve already met 3 in real life when they were passing through town. I have yet to spend an extended visit with them.
Great post. I look forward to reading more from you girls.
February 14th, 2008 at 10:21 am
I met my husband online!!
Granted, it was back before this fancy doohickey internet was around, but we used to have an electronic messaging system and electronic groups at our college. We were in one group together, and our posts always made the other laugh.
We started msging each other based on that, then we met in person. We became the best of friends, then fell in love, got engaged, then married. This April we’ll be married 11 years, not counting the 5 years we had together before that. I’m sure there are a lot of sickos and crazies out there finding people on the internet but thankfully, that was never my experience. My hot hunka burning love is proof of that. 🙂
February 14th, 2008 at 11:02 am
Though we met locally, and hung out now and then, my husband and I became best friends online while he was at school. I’m a believer!
February 14th, 2008 at 11:40 am
I am looking forward to meeting some folks I’ve met this way…I must say that I’ve strengthened friendships online, but I haven’t yet met in person a new friend BECAUSE of my blog. (A chance coming up very soon, though, with someone else moving to Ukraine!!)
February 14th, 2008 at 11:49 am
I’m meeting Bethany in a week. I’m equally excited. And I’ll be at BlogHer this year, as well.
February 14th, 2008 at 12:43 pm
Most of my new social contacts, outside family, church and a few close friends, are made on the Internet first. I just had tea with a blogger who I have been reading for a few years. There was no awkwardness, as we already knew all about each other. I love this medium and keep up with friends via blogs, twitter, and, just this weekend for the first time, Video chat. It was a hoot.
February 14th, 2008 at 12:55 pm
I met my husband on-line, in a chat room, before internet dating was ‘big’. At the time, meeting someone (of the male persuasion) was the LAST thing I wanted at that time.
We met in person after only a month of hours and hours logged chatting both on-line and via phone.
Today is our 10th Valentine’s Day together!
February 14th, 2008 at 7:11 pm
I have been so lucky to meet several of my bloggity friends.(Kerfloppy included). I have also met lots of bloggers when I’ve traveled…A group in Wisconsin and in Arizona.
I have never been disappointed with a Blog meetup. They are always better than expected.
I’m going to BlogHer and I am practically SQUEEING myself at the thought of meeting so many of these people that I have been talking to forever. (YOU included!)
February 15th, 2008 at 1:20 am
I love having this thread to point my real life acquaintances to when they say ANYTHING about meeting people online.
What great stories of love and friendship!
February 16th, 2008 at 11:33 pm
I just love how a distant technology can truly bring people together. I actually met my only friend online. I not only read her blog that hired writers create, but I also have a subscription to her magazine, simply titled “O”. She’s invited me many times over to come watch her at her job. I have declined, of course, because I know she likes to give away items to her audiences…And I don’t want to demean or belittle the closeness we share as true friends. Besides, I do not want her to ever consider me as befriending her for her money.
Thanks for allowing me to share ‘my story.’
February 18th, 2008 at 2:30 am
Seriously Mr. OMSH, am I going to have to block you?
Say it with me.
GOOBER.
February 18th, 2008 at 2:20 pm
I don’t know if the blogosphere is ready for Mr. OMSH. Sarcasm = thread killer, apparently.
p.s., O wishes she could be my friend. But I pitch my tent with Martha.
February 28th, 2008 at 7:11 pm
I met my hubby online. It was pre-internet, so we actually met on a local BBS chat room. Then, in person at a MUPT. And, just for fun, we set up our network at home so that we could chat online because we missed it. All of this was way before I’d ever heard of a blog.
There is a chance, now that we’ve moved, that I’ll get to meet a blogger I really like. She’s suggested that we get together the next time she comes thru town and I’m excited.
Just for the record, I want to meet Jessica or Heather (or Mr. OMSH) way more that Oprah or Martha.